Wake up!!

I really need to wake up and smell reality!
I need to stop living in my own fairy tale bubble,
Hoping that things will be okay.
Hoping that there was a slight chance he would change his mind.
Hoping that there was a tinge of hope I could fix things when I got back.
Hoping that some day, we would be together once again. 

I couldn't wait any longer.
I got my answer.
She has admitted that she is falling for him,
and that they are trying to move forward.

I know I have said that I feel no anger.
Only disappointment, and betrayal.
But perhaps, I was wrong.
I do feel angry after hearing that piece of news.
Shattered!
Like the slightest hope, has been pulled from underneath me.
Tripping me, making me fall to the ground once again.
The 2 people that I care about, and love,
Stabbing me, and leaving me to bleed to death.

I may be angry that he is moving on so quickly. 
For giving up on what we had.
I may be angry that she has chosen him instead,
Over 10 years of friendship.
But mostly, I am angry at myself.
For having been so stupid.
For having not seen this coming.
For putting so much faith on them,
To not do this to me now.

I feel stupid,
For thinking that I was the happiest woman on earth.
For thinking that I had everything I wanted.
For thinking that he loved me, the way I love him.

But I am wrong.
So please Mei,
Freaking wake up, and move on!!
You gotta be more courageous!! You have got to!!