.
I got to thinking after getting off the phone last night,
Could I be a masochist in some ways? Could it be that I enjoy the pain?
Or do I put up with it, simply because of the sweet, pleasant memories behind it?
Or perhaps, the pain is worth it, due to the little moments of happiness I get outta it.
Could this be the "selfless" love that others refer to?
That you really can love someone without having to have them?
Am I wasting my time with something that will lead to nowhere?
Or really, should I just live life the way I want, the way I feel comfortable with,
knowing that I'm just throwing away my youth?
For ultimately, it is MY life I'm living...
Because, life is fragile...
Life is too short.
We all start dying, from the moment we start living. O_o
10 comments:
Welcome to America! We are all like that but to some they can't stand it. Join me and the many others and just be happy with you.
aiya, u have to start thinking about urself lah, go get urself a good man & move on, don't dwell in the past!
Once, I too was depressed about lost love. It was sweet in its own depressing and painful ways. It was an addiction. To embark into an unknown emotion other than the one I once knew was scary. It became my solace and comfort zone. Don't get to comfortable with that or it can hold you back from enjoying your life with someone new who can bring out the best in you.
I can understand that you are going through the 'forget-you-not' phase, but remember that to live is to love and to love is to live – only if you are happy. What is gone cannot be replaced and you may feel you can never again find the same love. But is that all there is to it? A lost love?
One day you may wake up and realise it’s time to let go and move on, yet you may feel dreaded to do so. Letting go takes time… no doubt, but be happy that you have your family and friends with you all the way. I think until you are ready to let go of the past, whoever you meet and may love will always have to fight for a spot in your heart and against the past. He may fight on to reach you deep inside but how long can he fight if you keep holding on to the past? An effort a day to embrace the unknown helps you to let go. All the best. May you find love in the most compatible man for you.
P/S: There’s no right man, only the most compatible.
Coldguy: You are all like that? As in, you guys are all masochist?
Wuching: I have been thinking bout myself, I AM thinking of myself... which was the thing that led me to this post.
I am starting to wonder if I am being too comfortable, stuck this way. Perhaps I'm enjoying this painful love, without me really realising.
OoOo.. scaryyy.
Anonymous: OoHhh... The first paragraph really described me. I have no more to say! *shocked*
Everyday, I wake up intending to move on, but some kinda force pulls me back, and before I know it, I'm back at Square 1. And slowly, I begin to accept things the way they are.
But yes, I know... someday, I'll find better, I'll be better.
And *shocked* once again, *he* told me before, that there isn't just one right one, but more the most compatible one.
Just who are you, anonymous, to pick my mind like that? Hehe.
Wouldn't say i understand what you're going thru. But one thing I do know. The longer you endure the pain, the more numb you feel. And when you reach that stage, that's when you can't differentiate what's painful and what's not any longer. That's dangerous - losing your sense of pain (emotionally) due to chronicity. You'll start getting used to it and it'll turn into an addiction. You might even go the length of wanting to 'remind' yourself what pain feels like by deliberately putting yourself into situations where you'll definitely feel pain - addiction. I'm in no way implying that's what you're doing.
You're no masochist. You're just a girl. Just a girl who has deep feelings for someone who's not there for you at this moment in time. You are aware of that. Accept that; and try not to put yourself through unnecessary pain k? =)
You can call me a friend or a bystander - whichever you prefer. To know and understand someone comes from the heart even if they don't know you in person. Sometimes your enemy or an acquaintance may know you better than your friends or family... connected through experiences of similar emotions.
Like how Gary (above) has put it... the longer you endure the pain, the more numb you would become. Don't. I literally have stopped loving since my so-called lost love, and I’m now so accustomed to it that even now although I no longer mooning after my lost love, I'd rather remain single than to be with someone. I've become numb. So numb that it feels more comforting than to have someone in my life. And that has caused me to lose out on some special times with certain ppl that I can have cherished moments with. It’s your life and it’s your call. Live and enjoy whatever emotions that may come in your way or shun them and continue to cry for the moon. Take care.
gary: Thanks for the concern. I will try my best, I promise.
After all, we all wanna be happy, rite? :) I don't wanna be too numb to feel it all.
anonymous: You sound like you've been through alot too. May you find true happiness one day.
You take care too. I'll be alrite, thanks :) I still believe that one day, *someone* will come along and sweep me off my feet. Hehehe.
Post a Comment