I'm still alive...

Just wanted to let you guys know that I'm still alive (whoever that reads my blog still). I feel like nobody ever reads it anymore, which is partially the reason why I've been so lazy with updating... 

But on the other hand, it was started because I've never been a diary writer, and just wanted to keep visual memories of my life, for myself... be it interesting or not... I do look into my archives and read my previous entries, and it still bring back raw emotions, on how I felt about things back them... about people I love, people I've lost, people whom I've crossed path with, that have changed my life in big ways, little ways... 

Little things that we do in the past, changes our future in some ways... Looking back, I never would have thought that I'd meet Jon... what more be in a relationship for such a long time (yes, sometimes I feel like we're a married couple). Never would have thought that I'd wanna live in Melbourne long term. 

True enough I wanted a job and career here, but I always thought that I was gonna return home one day, to mend things back home. I was determined then that I knew that I had the best person in my life and lost him, and that I was never gonna get into another relationship, because it will never be the same, it will never be as good or near as perfect. 

But one day, fate brought us together. It was purely by chance how we met in that cafe, and how subconsciously I opened my heart to you. Dear, if you happen to be reading this, I don't know why I feel so emo today, but watching you sleep so peacefully next to me... I feel truly lucky to be here, to be yours... 

How my life has changed over the past few years. How the trials and tribulations in my life has made me a stronger person... How your family has taken me in with no questions asked, and made me feel like a part of everything...

Looking back, I'm really glad that you asked me out to dinner. I'm really glad that I actually gained enough courage to return call, after chickening out the night before. I'm really glad that the choices we made then, brought us here today. 

Happy birthday, Aunty Eng!! XOXO

Us @ Sichuan Dining Room, Glenferrie Road. - The company was great, but I can't say the same about the food there! Let's just say, I wouldn't recommend it, and neither will I return for a second meal. Uuurrr, it wasn't really my cuppa tea ;)

Someone wise once told me, that different people we meet, at different points of our lives, are meant to teach us certain things. They are there to bring the best out of us, make us see things in different light, bring out qualities that we never knew we had. Put us to the test to make us stronger... There is no such thing as "bad timing" because God always has a reason. Hansen, I've never mentioned your name in my blog before, but I really wanna thank you for showing me so much, for knowing and understanding me inside and out. It's true when you said "Things may seem bleak at the moment, but you'll realise it one day". 

And I understand what you mean now. 

And to my dear Jon, I cannot thank you enough for changing my life in a significant way. For always being here for me, through thick or thin. Not just you, but your whole family. Despite our stupid arguments, we're still closer than ever. (What doesn't kill us, only makes us stronger, huh?)

I love the way you hold me in your sleep,

I love the way you say the wittiest things, in the randomest times,

I love the way you come home from work, and gives me a kiss, 

I love the way you hold my waist when we walk on the streets, 

I love the way you still open the car door for me, 

I love the way you put your arms around me in clubs and bars, to protect me, 

I love the way you always ask whether I'm okay when I'm on night shifts, 

I love the way you tolerate me when I'm grumpy post nights, 

I love the way you love me... unconditionally. 

Mom, dad and Funny... I miss you guys heaps, and always wish I could share more with all of you and spend more time together... but if you guys happen to be reading this - I just wanna let you know that I'm happy. I love all of you to bits! XOXO