I was telling Addy that I wanna do a posting in Oncology next year,
and she went (O.o) "Are you sure? You tend to get too emotionally attached to your patients".
"Hmm, I do too... I'm a little bit like Izzie Stevens, except that I don't fall in love with them. Hehehe".
It got me thinking, although I like that specialty,
I like the fact that I'm giving some extra quality time to some seriously ill patients,
Although I don't deny that I might be deeply saddened,
and very much emotionally drained by the end of my shift everyday...
Speaking of which, I saw a patient in ED the other day.
A palliative oncology patient, with metastatic bowel cancer, to... everywhere basically.
She came in with worsening ascites, and unstable INR.
We didn't do a tap at that time, after discussion with the Oncology reg,
because she had an outpatient appointment in a few days' time,
and her INR was elevated, which increases her risk of bleeding...
AND her ascites wasn't tense at that time.
So, I asked if she would prefer to be admitted for monitoring,
or to go home, and come back for her appointment in a couple of days...
Obviously, she chose to go home, to spend some quality time with her family.
Today, she returned....
Looking alot worse.
Yet, managed to gimme a smile when I asked
"Aww, you're back. How are you feeling?"
"Not too bad" she said...
But I knew, she was just being positive.
She was not feeling good.
She could not even wait till her scheduled appointment the day after.
She was failing, dying..
We knew it.
She knew it too...
But this time around, I made the decision to admit. I rang the reg and said that she needed to come in.
Her ascites wasn't tense.
But clearly, she wasn't coping at home.
Things are not getting any better for her.
Why can't we just make her remaining days,
A little more comfortable for her.
**We gave her Prothrombinex and Vitamin K, and drained her ascites**
And in the end, it all felt worth it...
Yes Addy, you're right... I am emotionally attached to my patients. But I don't believe it makes me a bad doctor. I believe it makes me human. It makes me their friend. It makes me...
A better doctor. :)
5 comments:
I did not say it makes you a bad doctor :(
I also believe that our emotions are what that makes us human, and never once have I doubted that. And that's what makes us the better doctors than those who doesn't feel. =) It's just that, sometimes, it hurt a lot more than what I expect when I get too emotionally attached to a patient.
ade: Oh no, I wasn't implying that you said I was a bad doctor :)
Hope I didn't sound that way...
I'm touched by this post. You're so big hearted. You go do the right thing girl!
Being emotional, can work for you, or against you...
What you get out of it...it's a matter of your choice...
At least that's how I see it...
I am actually quite the same as you! I do get emotionally attached to my patients! can't help though...just human.
Post a Comment